…und Pokal auch!

No, i’m not dead. Mia San Triple. That’s what matters.

Dante and Gustavo just won the Confederations Cup (sorry Martinez) and now they’re growing new arms to lift all those cups

 

This is how Dante and Goose will look like in 2013-14. And more is coming!

BTW, did i told you GÖTZE IS A BAYERN PLAYER?

BTW, did i told you he arries injured and probably will debut only in October? Koan #19 in season’s debut unless the Hansi Müller-Miracle Medic does another of his miracles

BTW, welcome Jan Kirchhoff #15

5ERVU5 AND GRIA5 GOTT, GOODY-GOODIE5, MIA 5AN EUROPAMEI5TER”

5ORRY DORTMUND

Be5t regard5

Arjen Fucking “i never criticized him” Robben

 

Enough talk, have at you!

EUROPA I5T ROT

 

Now i’m waiting for 5ome merchandi5ing relea5ing on eBay to annihilate my credit card’5 limit

Anything + éry = win

Back dahoam after the shameful Minsk Incident, looked like Hoffenheim could upset Bayern again and throw FCB at a slump. Could be, if Ribéry didn’t appeared again to save the day again with two goals.

Damn, Le Scarface is playing godlike, overkilling, so good it’s horrible lately. Why no one is considering him a top-10 or top-5 of the world by now?

Mia san THIS?

OK, even my strategical pessimism didn’t expected this result. In the first matchday i said  “thankfully i’m not a Lille fan” since they lost 3-1 against BATE… and we also lost 3-1.

Schande. Now it’s carrying on and preparing to play Hoffenheim. No further comments.

And please no Kroos-Schweini in the “2”

Un-motherfucking-stoppable

It looked like Werder would give Bayern their first draw, or even their first defeat of the season, but…

Then Gustavo scored at the 81th minute

And Mandzukic scored the second two minutes later

Damn, who designed that uniforms? This is the worst Bayern kit EVER.

What is a Mandzukic?

A miserable little pile of goals. Super Mario II came from the bench and scored two against his former club Wolfsburg. Schweini opened the score in the first half, and Bayern’s BEST SEASON START EVER continues

Oppan Kroos Style

Bayern is back dahoam in Teh Champions. Dominated the whole game but only won 2-1 vs. Valencia (Schweinsteiger and Kroos scored for Bayern, Valdez for Valencia)

The good: Kroos’ great goal

The bad: Mandzukic missed a penalty

The ugly: What was that crap that happened in Valencia’s goal?

Back to the Bundesliga, back to Gelsenkirchen, back to another 2-0 win against Schalke 04.

Kroos scored another masterpiece, Müller scored his masterpiece also, and FCB runs along Eintracht Frankfurt in the top of the Bundesliga. Not only this, but Bayern won ALL their official matches until now.

The good: Alaba is back to training, after two long months. The injuries are starting to get healed 🙂 Soonly Gomez will also return (and try to catch up Mandzukic)

Oh yes x2

First Bayern wins 3-1 vs. Mainz (Mandzukic, Schweinsteiger and Kroos. Look, Javi Martinez assisted the last goal!). Then, Robbéry is back and will play vs. Valencia tomorrow

OAH! Mia san back in business!

Life is particularly good to a strategically pessimist FCB fan like me these days

The 2012-13 Shop Catalogue Analysis

Red Bull is for weaklings. THIS doth be TREUE MACHT

Good to stay awoken when FCB goes to that winter break tours in Asia

The “poor man’ version of the Chronik book (without the harder-than-hard cover and the hundred-euros price tag

WAIT! Mia scho PREMIUM edition!

If this would be our 2013-14 trikot, no one would ever complain

OK, Adidas, SHUT UP AND TAKE MY DIREDARE

 

The 2012-13 Quartett. Displayed above: three of the five cards needed to summon Exodia in this game

I wouldn’t be surprised if this jacket were bulletproof

Uma vez Fla… oops, wrong language.

BOSS jacket for BOSSES

Unfortunately the “12” couldn’t be added. Neither the 13 (strategical pessimism mode on)

The really awkward moment when the FCB shop doesn’t ship to Brazil 😦

There we see Arjen Robben with the Netherlands kit?! Oh no, it’s just our training kit

From Justin Bieber fan to UFC fighter: the 2012-13 David Alaba

Remember to add the classic FCB-Punch when a conflict starts

Could they at least make the text black, dark blue or any color but re and white? Die FAIL weht im wind

Plush Robben… with too much hair

Plush Ribéry!! (next time please make a plush Dante. It would be a best-seller)

Personalli i wouldn’t appreciate too much scaring my family every breakfast while i drink coffee and wake up the whole neighborhood with one more of the classical “Items Which Play Stern Des Südens” Collection

The Chuck Norris of medicine haves one section dedicated to him

So it ends now, so you can choose the best shop.fcb.de items to make your own Gangnam Style video

Half-hour of Doom

Harnik scored at 25′ and i told myself “you were right, man, mia san screwed. Again.

BUT WAIT A MINUTE!

And boom goes Müller scoring at the 32′ mark

And boom goes Kroos scoring at the 34′

And BOOM goes Gustavo scoring at the ’44

OK, we have the three points already (or not), let’s just keep the result at second half…

BUT WAIT SIX MINUTES!

Mandzukic score s in the 47′, Müller adds his second in the 49′ and Schweini (HE’S BACK!) scored at 51′. 6-1 gegen Stuttgart. Beautiful.

And Javi Martinez FINALLY debuted. The #8 came from bench

Our CL opponents (Lille, Valencia -oh, the momories of 2001!- and BATE Borisov) watched it. Carefully. Even the most (strategical) pessimistic fan like me already included FCB as one of the front runners for Champions League glory this season after the early season performances, and considering this year’s bench is over 9000 times better than the previous season (when Bayern sometimes struggled even to fill the seven  bench spots), it can happen.